I'm not old enough to be a mummy!

I turned thirty a good 8 months ago now, and I've always made a big deal out of age for some reason.

In the lead up to my thirties I was in a big stress, arrrgh goodbye twenties, hello being serious and grown up in my thirties. What a scary prospect!

I'm sure everybody feels like this to some extent, in my head I'm still 18, running around university campus trying to meet as many new people as I could and trying to do as many adventurous and crazy things as I could.

I did achieve an awful lot in my twenties (well I like to think so anyway!). I got my degree, I lived and worked in Austria, I studied in Berlin, I taught English in China for nearly two years, I went travelling around Asia, I saw Everest (a high point, boom boom), I completed a graduate management training scheme, I got a post-graduate diploma in management, I nearly got to the end of my Masters degree (just my dissertation to go now!), I met my long-term partner, I bought a flat, I got pregnant....and breathe!

Now in my thirties I've got my gorgeous baby girl and I can't wait to show her all the places I've been and let her discover the world. But, there is something about me that thinks, hang on a minute, I'm a mum, I'm the grown up now, I've got to do grown up things and be the responsible parent! It's all a bit scary, I don't feel old enough!

By the same token, in the area where I live I feel relatively young next to many other first time mums. This being London, the price of living is high, women are pursuing their careers, and have children much later. My 'sister-in-law' is about to have her first baby at 36. In some ways this makes me feel like a bit of a misfit where I live, I feel like a bit of an outsider with other parents as I feel really young next to them and often feel like I'm judged negatively for it - I look younger than my years and don't have any noticeable bling on my fingers!

Anyway, I clearly have a complex about my age for some reason and I really should be worrying about better things, age is just a number after all!

 

Do you worry about your age? Do you feel old enough to be a parent?! What activities should I plan for my thirties?